Oh, moustache is bigger
It’s bigger than you
And you are not me
The lengths that I will grow to
This moustache in your eyes
Oh no, I’ve shaved too much
I trimmed it up…
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Posts tagged as:
moustache
Jude Law is sporting a stache presuably for his newest movie role in “Sherlock Holmes: The Case of the Silky Pornstache”
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We’d like to give a nod to some of the innovators of pornstache, those daring souls that blazed a hairy trail for the common man. Nobody deserves more credit than Burt Renyolds, god of stache. Through backwoods adventures, redneck antics, speed demonry and the Whorehouses of Texas…the moustache persevered, never a gourgeous shiney hair out of place. A true example of the power of stache.
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As gaggle is to goose, pride is to lion and hairgasm is to pornstache. These fellows call themselves “software developers” however we suspect it is just a cover to days spent on yachts in St. Tropez and nights spent in the discotheques of Prague. As evidenced here, the centuries old adage, “Pornstaches of a kind stick together”.
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When you have 6 children, it is imperative to their development that they enjoy a family pet, but with an international jet-setting lifestyle, the transport and care of a pet can be difficult. Solution? Grow a pet that you can carry everywhere as it handily perches on your upper lip. Add a pair of aviators a fedora and voila! Perfection.
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Another certified pornstache from a mister Brian Cromer. This stache was appearantly sprouted in China which adds to its international appeal. Additionally, the creepy closed-mouth smile and wide-angle lens effect add to the impact of this stache. Mr. Cromer, we salute you!
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Dissatified with the creepiness of his alcoholic bloat, under-eye bags and quickly receeding hairline, Vince Vaughn has added a pornstache to really bring home his look.
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The youth are always ahead of the fashion curve, hence McCauly Culkin sporting a way-ahead of the curve pornstache for his arrest in 2003 on drug charges. I say if you can maintain such precise pencil pornstache grooming while all fucked up on pot and Xanax then more power to you!
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Many have attempted the pornstache and many have failed. Celebs almost always get it right, but they have teams of pornstache stylists helping them. Sometimes it is hard for the everyday guy to tell when one has crossed the oh-so-subtle line into a true pornstachio. That is why we are introducing our pornstache certification.
Do not trust the authenticity of any pornstache without this seal.
To celebrate, we would like to issue our first award to This Guy
The beautiful woman, the tousled bed-head, the heavenly light, the exposed chest hair and most of all the handlebar pornstache. Yes, this is the real deal. Congratulations.
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