From the category archives:
Drawing on 2 facts that were established in the 70’s
1. Pornstaches increase speed
2. Pornstaches are the best accessory to a speedo
the Phelpster debuted a pornstache recently. Who is his PR person? Nothing say’s I’ve cleaned up my bong toting image more than a handlebar pornstache…
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Adam Morrison proves that white men can jump and also that they can have really corny 70’s hair complete with a patchy pornstache.
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It has been noted that late-stage NHL players often grow a pornstache because of the shiny bristly distraction that a pornstache can add to a face, thus detracting from the appearance of generally mangled facial bone-structure and missing teeth.
However, George Parros, acclaimed player for the Anaheim Ducks is sporting an early career pornstache begging the question, does a pornstache carry magical or ayrodynamic properties which actually increase hockey skills? Yes, my friend. The answer is yes.
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